When the Unthinkable Happens
Nothing prepares you for the loss of someone you love. Whether it’s a parent, spouse, friend, or child, grief can feel like a storm that will never end. There are moments of disbelief, anger, numbness, and deep loneliness.
For Christians, loss can also stir spiritual questions: Why did God allow this? Where is He now? Will I ever feel joy again? The Bible doesn’t shy away from those questions — and neither should we. God meets us in our mourning, not outside of it.
The Many Faces of Grief
Grief doesn’t follow a timeline. It comes in waves — sometimes strong, sometimes quiet. It can affect your sleep, appetite, memory, and faith. You might find yourself fine one day and undone the next.
Grieving well doesn’t mean “getting over it.” It means allowing God to walk with you through it. Psalm 23 reminds us: “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me.” The key word is through — God promises presence in the valley, not avoidance of it.
What the Gospel Says About Grief
Jesus wept (John 11:35). The shortest verse in Scripture may be its most powerful — it shows us a Savior who grieves with us. When Lazarus died, Jesus didn’t rush to explain. He entered the pain first.
The gospel offers hope that goes beyond sympathy:
- Jesus Understands Our Pain. He knows the agony of loss.
- Death Is Defeated. Because of the resurrection, death doesn’t have the final word.
- We Will See Them Again. For those who trust in Christ, heaven promises reunion and restoration.
1 Thessalonians 4:13 says, “We do not grieve like those who have no hope.” Christians still grieve — but our grief is infused with eternal perspective.
Practical Steps Toward Healing
1. Allow Yourself to Grieve
There’s no right or wrong way to mourn. This could look like crying, remembering, laughing, clenching your fists and yelling in anger, or curling up to simply ache or feel numb. Show your lament however you need, for as long as you need. God can handle your real, raw emotions. Read the Psalms aloud, they give voice to both sorrow and hope.
2. Lean on Safe People
Grief can isolate. Stay connected to those who will listen and pray for you. Invite trusted friends or pastors into your story.
You don’t have to walk through grief alone. A BrewPastor can be a safe, compassionate presence in this season. Meet with a BrewPastor here.
3. Remember with Intention
Create rituals or memorials that honor your loved one: light a candle, plant a tree, write letters, or share stories. Remembering keeps love alive in healthy ways.
4. Take Care of Your Body and Soul
Grief drains energy. Rest often, eat nourishing food, and spend time outdoors. Simple habits of care become spiritual practices in times of loss.
5. Bring Your Pain to God
Don’t filter your prayers. Tell Him everything — the anger, the confusion, the longing. Healing often begins with honest lament.
When Faith Feels Fragile
It’s normal to struggle spiritually after loss. You may feel distant from God or frustrated that prayers weren’t answered the way you hoped. Faith doesn’t mean pretending to be okay. It means holding on — even weakly — to the One who holds you.
In moments of doubt, lean on the faith of your community. Let others believe for you until your strength returns.
BrewPastors were created for times like this — to listen, pray, and walk with people in pain. Talk to a BrewPastor today.
Helpful Resources for Grieving Hearts
- Books:
- Online Support & Articles:
- GriefShare – Christ-centered support groups nationwide.
- If You’re in Crisis:
- If you or someone you know are experiencing suicidal thoughts or are in crisis as a result of loss, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (24/7, free, and confidential).
Holding on to Hope
Grief will change you, but it doesn’t have to define you. The empty seat at the table, the silent phone, the traditions and rituals, the memories that bring tears — all of it can become sacred ground where God meets you with comfort and strength.
Revelation 21:4 promises, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain.” That day is coming. Until then, God walks with you, breath by breath, moment by moment.
If you need prayer, a listening ear, or help finding peace again after a loss, connect with a BrewPastor today. You don’t have to carry grief alone.